Bill Roper (billroper) wrote,
Bill Roper
billroper

All Right-Thinking People

As we all know, all right-thinking people agree with me on all topics, no matter how debatable or nuanced they may seem to others. In fact, people who believe that these topics are debatable or nuanced are obviously not right-thinking people.

Because all right-thinking people agree with me on all topics, it is important for me to insinuate subtle -- or even not so subtle -- references to issues that I care strongly about into any conversation. Right-thinking people will regard these asides as clever and amusing, because they are -- of course! -- right-thinking people and agree with me on all issues.

Should anyone respond to my clever and amusing asides in a negative fashion, they are being impolite, because all right-thinking people agree with me that my clever and amusing asides are important contributions to the conversation. People who are made uncomfortable by these asides are obviously not right-thinking people and should seriously rethink their obviously incorrect position, no matter how subtle and nuanced they may believe the topic to be.

It is, of course, always polite for me to include my clever and amusing asides in any conversation, because all of the right-thinking people agree with me and find them clever and amusing, while those who don't find them clever and amusing should never be offended, but should take this opportunity to seriously rethink their obviously incorrect position. In fact, it is my solemn duty to include these asides, because the sooner these not-right-thinking people get their heads on straight (which my asides will certainly encourage them to do), the better off we will all be.

Oh, dear. Did I forget to turn the sarcasm filter on? I knew I was forgetting something...

Edit: The person who prompted this post does not have a LiveJournal account. I'm not annoyed with any of you...
Tags: home, musings, politics
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