We Are So Doomed

When we returned from Fry's with our assorted goodie bags, we found no one in the family room. In fact, we found no one downstairs at all.
"Gretchen?" I called.
"I'm upstairs."
"Where's Katie?"
"Also upstairs."
"You carried her upstairs?"
"No, she carried herself."
It seems that Gretchen had a bit of intestinal distress (Burrito? Maybe...) and had hied off to the second floor bathroom, it being a bit more congenial to her post-surgical condition. She left Katie behind downstairs. When she finished up in the bathroom, she heard Katie crying at the foot of the stairs.
Except Katie wasn't at the foot of the stairs. She had crawled dutifully up the stairs in search of Mommy and was now two stairs away from the open gate at the top. Gretchen coaxed her up the last two steps and closed the gate behind her.
And so we found them watching TV on the bedroom floor.
Katie just climbed up the full flight of stairs on her own.
We are so doomed.